There was a little old lady who was suffering from a degenerative eye condition that had left her nearly blind.
She had three sons, and each wanted to prove that he loved her more than the others.
Son 1 bought her an expensive Mercedes, with a chauffeur included, thinking this would surely win her approval.
Son 2 bought her a 15-room mansion, thinking this would surely be the best that any of them could offer her.
You could name any verse, and the parrot could quote it word for word, what a gift that would be!
Well, the old lady went to the first son and said;
“Son, the car is beautiful It has everything you could ever want on it, but I don’t like to go out anymore, and the chauffeur is a nuisance, so please return the car.”
Then she surprised her second son by saying; “Son, the house is just gorgeous, but it’s much for me I only live in one room, and it’s too large to clean and take care of I really don’t need the house, but thank you anyway.”
Finally, she went to Son 3 and said; “Son, I just want to thank you for your most thoughtful gift that chicken was delicious.”
A beautiful woman loved growing tomatoes, but couldn’t seem to get her tomatoes to turn red.
One day, while taking a stroll, she came upon a gentleman neighbor who had the most beautiful garden full of huge red tomatoes.
The woman asked the gentlemen, “What do you do to get your tomatoes so red?”
The gentlemen responded, “Well, twice a day I stand in front of my tomato garden naked in my trench coat and flash them. My tomatoes turn red from blushing so much.”
Well, the woman was so impressed; she decided to try doing the same thing to her tomato garden to see if it would work.
So twice a day for two weeks she flashed her garden hoping for the best.
One day the gentleman was passing by and asked the woman, “By the way, how did you make out? Did your tomatoes turn red?”
No”, she replied, “but my cucumbers are enormous.”
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