A woman goes into a sporting goods store

 

Two old guys, one 80 and the other 87 were sitting on a park bench one morning.

The 87-year-old had just finished his morning jog and wasn’t even short of breath.

The 80-year-old was amazed at the guy’s stamina and asked him what he did to have so much energy.

The 87-year-old said, “Well, I eat rye bread every day. It keeps your energy level high and you’ll have great stamina with the ladies.”

So on the way home the 80-year-old stops at the bakery.

As he was looking around, the saleslady asked if he needed any help.

He said, “do you have any rye bread?”

She said, “yes, would you like some?”

The old guy said, yes, 5 loaves please.”

She said, “my goodness 5 loaves! By the time you get to the third loaf, it’ll be hard.”

The old man says to himself, I can’t believe everybody knows about this!

Two old women were sitting on a bench waiting for their bus.

The buses were running late, and a lot of time passed.

Finally, one woman turned to the other and said, “You know, I’ve been sitting here so long, my bum fell asleep!’.

The other woman turned to her and said “I know! I heard it snoring!”

A woman goes into a sporting goods store to buy a rifle.

“It`s for my husband,” she tells the clerk.

“Did he tell you what gauge to get?” asked the clerk.

“Are you kidding?” she says.

“He doesn’t even know that I`m going to shoot him!”